RefinED Friends,

If you have not yet had the opportunity to read Simon Sinek's newest book, Leaders Eat Last, give yourself a treat and do so. While I have found countless references supporting social emotional learning within this book's pages, one of the most powerful applications I have discovered is Sinek's clear review of brain science and how it can relate to the biggest pro-hazing excuse out there--"Hazing builds brotherhood/sisterhood."

Our brain releases countless neurochemicals based ...
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RefinED Friends,

As we conclude National Hazing Prevention Week, it's important that some of the most foundational aspects of hazing remain in the forefront--namely consent.

All too often, an excuse from those choosing to haze is, "We gave him/her the option to say no." OR "He/She told us he was okay with it."

Over the past few days, Clemson University's women's soccer team has been in the headlines for a hazing incident back in 2011. A former player alleges she was blindfolded with her freshmen...
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RefinED Friends,

Several days ago, while sifting through my Google Alert daily digest e-mails, I encountered an article entitled “Hazing to be Regular Event in Gardiner Basin” published April 7 in the Bozeman Daily Chronicle.

Regular event? Seriously?

Mind you, all I saw at the time was the article name, the publication date, and the source. (Looking back, there was more included below, but at the time I think my shock at the article title blocked all else from my view)....

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RefinED Friends,

Within the past few weeks, even more information has emerged regarding the tragic death of Michael Deng at Baruch College in New York.  This nineteen-year-old young man died at the hands of his future “brothers” after being subjected to excessive physical abuse.  The case has been ruled a homicide, and it is likely the young men involved will feel the legal, emotional, and public consequences for years to come.

Incidents like these clearly match the hazing ...

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RefinED Friends,

I spent this past weekend in New Orleans for a fraternity Board of Directors meeting.  During that time, we welcomed Dave Westol, founder of Limberlost Consulting, Inc., former Executive VP for Theta Chi Fraternity, and one damn fine dedicated Greek battling the hazing epidemic.  Among his many useful remarks, this resonated beyond others, "You can't be my friend and haze me."

The definition of 'friend' explicitly states 'an interpersonal bond beyond simple association.'  Those...
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RefinED Friends,

It was years ago. 

The basement was dark, the music loud.  I’d been led there, blindfolded, by an active member and told to wait.  I stood there, sensing other voices in the distance.  He told me, “Hold your arms straight out in front of you.”  I did. 

They became weighted with what could only be a tire.  “Don’t let it fall,” he said.  I didn’t. 

“Now, recite the Creed,” he demanded.  And so, from pure memorization, I did so.  The words me...

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RefinED Friends,

In 1852, Cardinal John Henry Newman delivered a series of lectures entitled "The Idea of a University", emphasizing how University environments are designed to mold student minds, not simply dispense knowledge.  Within his lectures, he spent time discussing his definition of a gentleman.  As I reread this portion today, a phrase struck me:

He (the gentleman) has his eyes on all his company; he is tender towards the bashful, gentle towards the distant, and merciful towards the a...

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